Legal Question in Family Law in California

Actually, there was recently an appellate case decided in which it was stated that no, there cannot be 3 legal parents, but only 2. Generally, the "sperm donor" has no rights, as that is part of the thing about being a sperm donor. The partner and other parent generally do an adoption. These cases can get very messy. I would highly suggest that you find counsel well versed in adoption and family law to help you with this. Good luck!

The problem that I have with Mr. Schneider's response is that he makes big assumptions with the lay term "sperm donor." My wife might joke at a party that I am the sperm donor, which is true, and I am the father of my kids.

The term sperm donor doesn't have any legal significance unless it was through artificial insemination through either a licensed sperm bank or a licensed physician.

In California, the issue is whether you used artificial insemination through a licensed physician. "The donor of semen provided to a licensed physician and surgeon or to a licensed sperm bank for use in artificial insemination or in vitro fertilization of a woman other than the donor's wife is treated in law as if he were not the natural father of a child thereby conceived." (Fam. Code, sect. 7613.)

If you used a licensed physcian or a licensed sperm bank for artificial insemination, then your domestic partner is the other parent. "[W]e conclude that a woman who agreed to raise children with her lesbian partner, supported her partner's artificial insemination using an anonymous donor, and received the resulting twin children into her home and held them out as her own, is the children's parent under the Uniform Parentage Act and has an obligation to support them." (Elisa B. v. Superior Court (2005) 37 Cal.4th 108.)

If you had some cute guy come over and supply the sperm without the supervision of a licensed physician, then the cute guy is the father.