Legal Question in Family Law in California

Child wants to live primary with father

I have a 12yr old son who just informed me that he would like to live primary with his father. He told me because he doesn't want to commute any longer (his dad lives 1 hour away), he wants to attend the schools in Manteca, he has friends in Manteca, and he feels closer to his father because he is starting pre adolescence. He told me that he would like to be with me every weekend except for one so that he can be with his father, six weeks with me 4 weeks with his father for the summer, spring break, and a few extra days in the Christmas break. His father and I have 50/50 custody now. It would change to approx 60/40. I want to do what is best for my son. His father drew up the agreement and wants me to sign. We had originally agreed for him to go to a school halfway between us but my son changed his mind. I just want to make sure I am doing the right thing and I need some advice? Thanks.


Asked on 6/06/06, 1:16 pm

1 Answer from Attorneys
KATHIE SIMMONS KATHIE SIMMONS

Re: Child wants to live primary with father

It sounds as if your son has thought this through quite maturely. The rule of thumb is that by age 12 children should be able to have their views considered. I have known teens that continued a 50/50 arrangement but the two houses were very close together. I would prepare myself for further reduction of time in a couple of years. Even when teens are in the house with you they tend to be doing their own thing in their room. Work, sports or just hanging out with friends may conflict with your carefully drawn childsharing arrangement. If child support is an issue you can agree to "nonguidelines" child support in whatever amount is agreeable without regard to the percentage timeshare. Either party may ask for a modification to guidelines if they change their minds but often won't in that it was an agreement made in good faith. This takes the pressure off of the child when he decides he wants to visit mom more or less time.

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Answered on 6/06/06, 2:56 pm


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