Legal Question in Family Law in California

Re: can daily phone calls from parent

There are a number of issues in your question.

1. Your being upset by the phone calls from the ex may be the cause of your child being sad after a telephone call.

Therefore you need to accept the telephone calls in a cheerful manner and then tell you son, convincingly, that you are glad that the ex is calling.

2. You should review your schedule and then request that the ex call during those times that would be the least disruptive to you and your child. State when homework time is scheduled and politely ask that he not call during that time. If necessary you should consider shifting the homework time to accomodate the ex's schedule if he cannot accomodate the present homework schedule. The length of telephone calls should be limited to something less than 1/2 hour, with some flexibility for special occasions.

3. Tell the ex that his is not to come to your home unless invited. If he continues to come over uninvited then get a court order excluding him from your home. He has no right to come into your home uninvited. To avoid your child being involved he should make the arrangements by telephone, talking only to you.

If this does not solve the problem then contact an attorney.

Re: can daily phone calls from parent

Children are usually the ones who are most hurt by divorce. As you already know by your own question; the courts decide these matters by what is in the best interest of the child. If you feel that the amount of contact that you husband is allowed to have with the child is not in the best interest of the child and is adversely affecting him or her, than you could do an OSC to modify your existing orders. The fact that it upsets you may not be a major factor.

Re: can daily phone calls from parent

You do not have to agree to daily phone calls. Make your argument to the court. Get a court date.

Re: can daily phone calls from parent

Being grown up means being able to be polite and gracious to people you hate. It is extremely hard to do but is well worth learning. It is time for you to grow up. You are very young for this hard lesson but you will be fine.

That being said, it seems to me you have a situation that can be handled diplomatically.

You need to work with your ex husband to get an agreement that will not negatively affect your child. You have an absolute right to get your husband to agree never to say anything critical of you. You have the same obligation never to say anything critical of your ex. Work this out. When you get an agreement with your ex you can take that agreement into court and the judge will sign it into law.

Until then you MUST obey any court order presently in effect.

Start now learning this difficult lesson of always being kind and gracious, even when you have to close your mouth to hide the rage. Once you get this lesson learned you will be like a trained dancer going through life -- you will have learned who you are. You will develop grace in all your relationships. You will succeed at every task you take on.

Do it for the sake of your family. Good luck.