Legal Question in Family Law in California

Disowning our adopted adult child, legally

Our nearly 21 year old adopted son has been a nightmare for the last 4 years. In and out or jail. Drug and alcohol problems. Now has 2 felonies and 4 misdmeanors. We have been giving him the best professional help possible. He has been diagnosed as bi-polar ADHD by one psychiatrist yet other professionals consider him borderline personality disorder(sociopathic) and schizophrenic.He is on meds. He is frightening when out on his own.I have feared for my safety as he has made threatening phone calls in the past. He is addicted to porno. He is now in a live in residential school yet still is doing wrong. Was caught writing sexual letters on My Space to as many females possible.Young and old. He is a sexual predator and pathological liar. We have done all we can to help him but he seems not to want to help himself. He had a wonderful childhood growing up in our family. How can we legally cut him loose? Disown him? Please help...this has been so hard on the whole family especialy his 3 siblings and grandparents. A terrible nightmare.

What do we do and who do we turn to? I want to make sure that he will have no legal bond to this family as I do not trust what he wil do next.

Thanks so much for any advice you can give.


Asked on 2/22/06, 2:37 pm

1 Answer from Attorneys

KATHIE SIMMONS KATHIE SIMMONS

Re: Disowning our adopted adult child, legally

Your problem is heartbreaking. I urge you to get into some therapy. I too have had drugs and criminal conduct as well as mental health diagnosis amongst my children/stepchildren so believe me I do understand. Legally, you have no duty to your adopted son and may specify in your will that he is to get nothing. You may seek a restraining order to prevent him from threatening or harrassing you if he persists after you write to him requesting that he stop contacting you. In addition to helping you with your own pain a good therapists may be able to help you to more effectively end your relationship. Your therapist may even contact his therapist or case worker. There are therapist that specialize in adoption issues. I would also hold a family meeting to get everyone together on this lest he simply redirect his attentions to the weakest link. Please email me again if I can help you even if just by listening.

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Answered on 2/22/06, 5:40 pm


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