Legal Question in Family Law in California

The father of my 1 year old decided he would not be involved in our daughter's life for a few years because he did not feel ready to be a father. He does not appear in her birth certificate since he was on a leisure trip when she was born. He only saw her a few times until she was 1 month and told me of his decision. He has not attempted to see her since and has never provided financial support. His family contacted me a couple of times to know of her and visit. I told them how she was doing, but denied their request to see her since I don't want her to be affected/confused later on as to why they are involved and her father isn't. He might try to come back, establish paternity and get custody. However, I don't think it would be beneficial for my daughter to have him be involved since he is unreliable, inconsistent and irresponsible. Is there anything I can do to prevent him from coming back and obtaining custody? Also, what is the likelihood he'll get custody or visitation rights? How long and expensive is the process for him to obtain paternal rights? Is there any other advice you can give me to protect my daughter from his instability and lack of interest?

Thank you for your advice. It is truly appreciated.

-Worried single mom


Asked on 7/26/10, 12:31 pm

1 Answer from Attorneys

If he did not sign a declaration of paternity with you at birth, he would have to file a parentage action in order to get any custody or visitation. He would also be subject to child support including possible arrearages by the time of the hearing. There really is nothing you can do, however, if he is the biological father and wants to prove it and take responsibility for his support obligations. The best thing to do is welcome it and try to make her relationship with her dad as good as it can be under the circumstances. You will not get any help from the legal system in trying to block their relationship, and in fact that is a factor in favor of giving him MORE custodial time.

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Answered on 7/26/10, 3:52 pm


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