Legal Question in Family Law in California
My husband wants a divorce but has not taken any actions. But I do because I have waited two years and I'm done letting him have his cake and eat it to via adultery. I've forgiven over and over but its time to move on. Ipacked hi things neatly and I gave him a choice - counseling and church or there's the door? A week later her left me and the kids. He moved out August 3, 2012. He gives me money to cover the bills, groceries, and the mortgage - the same he would be spending as if still living here. He has filed no legal separation or anything. I have no 9-5 income, I work as a independant consultant for a candle company via orders on line and catalogs. This income is 1099. But in this economy it has gone up and down. His income his income has carreid the weight while I'm a faithful wife, loving Christian mom, cheerleader mom, dedicated homemaker no doubt. When we refinanced the house, the loan was approved in his name but of course he doesn't want to lose it or put the kids and I on the street so thats why the kids and I are still here. We have an 18 year old son in College and he receives scholarship help thankfiully. He lives on campus but of course this is still home. Then a 17 year old daughter, of course with me, and an 8 year old daughter also with me. The money he gives me is simply not enough since he is paying his own $450 rent and $150 to his boss for company car usage, and car insurance. HERE'S THE BIG DEAL - Suddenly, papers for a PENSION came in and now he is panicking because he never took divorce action. He says I'm gonna put a hole in his pocket and make his life a living hell. No he's done that to my heart and our kids. SIMPLY I ASK - am I entitled to half? It is from Sears Co. who merged with Kmart's pension plan. He's only 54 but it says clearly her is entitled to it for his 17 years with Sears. It is for $39,000 and it can be paid as a lump sum this Dec. 2012 if I sign a waiver (since he's still married - his fault), and it is notarized by Nov. 19, 2012. I'm not signing anything! I want to know my rights as he worked with Sears for 17 years up until 1994. We met in '85, but were married in '92. So he says I'm only entitled to a percentage for the 2 years we were married while he still worked for Sears (1992-1994). Is this true? We already had one child, my son, born Dec. 1993. Don't I get half ? We just made 20 years this May 30th, 2012. I tried to sit down and reason with him but he's being very uncouth. Please help me and my kids. our house needs at least $5000 in repairs. He neglected these repairs for the last 3 years...unfortunately now I know because his mind, and heart, were somewhere else. I know we are a NO FAULT state, but Good things come to those who wait, and I've waited 2 years for him to make it up to me and the kids, and he just won't surrender to his addiction. THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2 Answers from Attorneys
You must consult with a family law attorney as soon as possible. The length of your marriage and the pension compensation issues make this the type of case that requires professional involvement. Your options, given your concerns from both emotional and a perspective that considers your issues of faith, range from divorce to legal separation with appropriate support provisions for you and for the children including medical support. From your question, my sense is that you may have some concerns and perceptions about the divorce process that should be resolved with appropriate consultation and education about the rights and responsibilties of marital partners. You may also want to work with a counselor to help you focus on the factual legal matters that can be addressed in the context of a divorce proceeeding. Your situation is unfortunate but not uncommon. Focusing on the practical rather than the emotional will allow you to have, at the conclusion of any family law process, with a resolution that protects your long term interests.
To answer your question, the community gets the portion of the pension contributed to during the marriage. The community portion gets divided into half. You don't get half of the entire pension.
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