Legal Question in Family Law in California

I live in California

I am a man with 2 little boys....My wife is planning on leaving me and taking the kids, I have been out of work, so my wife has been working while I stay at home and feed and care for our children,, she spends no quality time with them... basically they are extremely bonded with me and come to me when they need something , even if she is there, she is incapable of supplying their "needs" like me...

a mom raising boys has its limits....

shes moving "far" from me

she's taking my 1 son out of school in the middle of the school year

ok question.... I really am financially incapable of surviving when she moves on my small income, again i am still technically unemployed...... do you think I am entitled to spousal support?

she has been maintaining our lifestyle, while I have been home not really going out of the house to work

.... and am I justified in wanting majority custody "keeping" my boys?,

basically SHE is causing this...

she is placing undue financial hardship on me through this

Wouldn't I have the same rights as a woman who was the stay at home MOM?

since I'm a stay at home DAD?

I have never abused this woman and in fact had to call the police once on her because she "snapped"

I and my children are the victims, they don't wqant to move with her really... but they are 5 and 9 years of age...

can someone please help me, answer this?

thank you


Asked on 1/25/10, 1:18 pm

2 Answers from Attorneys

If you want to play "hard ball" here and the domestic violence incident was in the last five years, there is a presumption based on the domestic violence that she is not suitable for primary custody. Now playing that card will make things instantly ugly, so be careful. But it is there. Given the circumstances, you probably should just go ahead and be the one to file for divorce. That way you can file motions at the same time for custody, child support and spousal support. You do, in fact, have the same rights (and responsibilities) as a stay at home mom. That would include the same rights to spousal support if your marriage and financial facts call for it. It would also include the same responsibility to go out and try to find work and become self-supporting and get off spousal support. You also have a duty to find work once you are separated and divorced in order to contribute to the support of the children. Divorced parents who don't work and don't look for work eventually are ordered to look for work or their support is cut to what it would be if they were working. Given the disparity in income, you also have a right to ask that she pay attorneys fees for you, though without knowing your full financial picture I can't even begin to guess whether they would be awarded in your favor.

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Answered on 1/30/10, 1:36 pm
James Bame San Diego Law Office

FIle for custody and support. This office can prepare the documents for your for your best chance at success for an affordable rate. Contact me directly.

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Answered on 1/31/10, 8:25 am


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