Legal Question in Family Law in California
Hi, I've been married to a Patent Attorney for 8 yrs...separated since Dec. 31 of 2011. I moved away to a place that's 10 min. away. We have a daughter who will turn 4 yrs. old July 7th...and is finishing up on her last day of school tomorrow and will be leaving this school because they only offer part time classes. Anyway, I'm waiting for my husband to decide if he's still willing to go to Marital Therapy with me to either save our marriage or finally have him file for divorce. My condo's lease expires at the end of July and I recently told him that if he chooses to file for divorce...I would move back to Chula Vista, Ca. which is where I'm originally from and have all my family there for support. We live in SD, Ca. and he stayed living in the house we own...I had him take care of all the finances and never questioned anything regarding that topic...he always asked me to help out and I would tell him that that wasnt my thing because I'm not good with finances. Now, I wish I would have helped out. I was 6 months pregnant over 4 yrs ago when we had just purchased the home he's living in and apparently I signed a paper that now I come to find out that I signed my part of the house over to him. He's never had me on the Title. Dumb of me I know! Anyway, he and I both agreed to having her go to a Montessori Preschool he's heard great things about which happens to be located maybe 5 min. away from our original home...I told him that if he starts her at that school I don't want the judge to consider her staying at that school in case he and I divorce because of the fact that he won't want her to be moving around so much for my daughter's sake. Anyway, if I move away after finding out he wants a divorce and she's already been going to this Preschool starting June 11 of 20012...will the judge want to keep her there since it's a school that also has an elementary. I had my husband write up an agreement stating that he and I both agree to have our daughter go to school at this Montessori school and in case of divorce she will not be forced to stay in case I want to move her to a different school? I just don't want to be forced into staying in SD near him who has his family 5 and 10 min. away from his place yet my family is about 25 min. away and my only support. He's been pushing me to get a job since he's been paying me some support every week since I left and tells me that I haven't been helping financially (supporting) I've always worked as a Preschool teacher for 12 years until my 8 months pregnancy and haven't worked again since then...we both agreed that I would stay home because it made more sense to not work and take care of our daughter rather than to pay someone else my whole check from teaching. My Therapist told me that he's pushing me to work fulltime now that he's been very determined into getting our daughter into school fulltime now more than ever...because he wants to pay me none or barely any money for spousal and child support and he maybe prepairing himself for this before he tells me it's over. It won't be easy to find a job anymore since teaching has been an issue with teacher's losing jobs and all. What can I do? Should I tell him that I'm going to wait to find out what he's going to decide regarding the divorce to see what I will then do with my life? Will that look bad if he were to take me to court for divorce shortly after and tell the judge that I have been lazy? during this time we have been separated ...I've had my daughter for the most part unabling me to work if I even wanted to because this was and is until Mon. June 11 my schedule with her...
Mon. I pick her up from his house at 8:30am. I have her all day until 4:30pm which is the time I drop her off at his house.
Tues. The only full night and day I don't have her during the week.
Wed. Morning I pick her up at 8:30am. and take her home with me
Thursday Dropped her off at school and she was with me all night
Friday during the day all day until 4:30pm I drop her off at her dad's if it's his weekend and if not I would keep her Wed, Th, Fri, Sat, and part of Sunday until after her nap around 4:30pm and that's our switch off.
Then come Monday morning I always picked her up at 8:30 am and keep her until 4:30pm drop off and so on.
As you can see, my schedule has not been consistant since Dec.31 2011 to be able to sustain a job.
Now, he's been pushing her fulltime at school and pushing me to go to work....what do you suggest I do regarding this situation?
If we do file for divorce...what are the chances that the judge will be willing to give me more than 50% custody considering that she's barely turning 4 July 7th?
He's an attorney and it makes more sense for her to be with her mother for the most part I think because she wants to be with me. She shows anger towards me when she knows she needs to go to her daddy's even though she loves him, she's always been used to being with me 24/7 because that was our agreement if I stayed home. What do you suggest I do for each and every one of my concerns. I'd really appreciate your help so much.
Thanks.
1 Answer from Attorneys
Your question raises more questions that need to be answered before a good opinion can be given. There is not definite answer as much up to the judge. You can call my office for a free consultation.