Legal Question in Family Law in California

If there is no paternity established you can't get a custody order, because it would make no sense. If he is not legally on record as the father, it makes no more sense to ask for an order granting you sole custody against him as asking for one against any random man on the street. Custody orders are only issued between two legal parents. So without paternity there can be no such order.

When you file your petition for paternity, file a motion for sole legal and physical custody. He will have to be served these pleadings.

Ms. Kock is correct, but only if you WANT to establish paternity. Since you want sole custody, it sounds like you want him out of your life. If so, filing to establish his paternity just opens the door to him claiming joint custody, or at least sole custody to you, with visitation to him, which he would almost certainly win at least to some degree. If there is no legal father on record, and you want to keep sole custody with no visitation, the last thing you want to do is file to get a paternity determination.

Now having said that, I personally think every child has a right to know who their father is and to receive both personal and financial support from that man. What if you get hit by a bus today? The child would go into foster care, most likely for the rest of her childhood, and then be dumped on the street at 18. But if you really don't want this man to be in her life, you don't want to file for paternity, because that WILL put him in her life, and yours.