Legal Question in Family Law in California
I am a single mother of an 8 y/o and 5 mos girls. They both have different fathers. The father of my 5mos and I are fighting to have custody of our child (this is his first child and we were never married to eachother). I want physical and legal custody of my child. I am willing to give him visitations on alternate weekends / holidays. The father has not helped my financially and has brought emotional pain to my family. ( My family is my 2 daughters and I) He has made us to believe that we can be a family, but has been having an unfair since I was pregnant with our child. On numerous occassions he has played with my 8 y/o emotions making her to believe that he can be her father one day, knowing that her father is deceased. I am emotionally drain and stressed. I am scheduled to have a mediation hearing in October and court the next day.
The only arguement I have to address the court is I have made a home for my two girls and would like to keep them together. I have financially taken care of my baby since my pregnancy. I do worry that the father may run off with the baby to Mississippi, since his family is settled there.
What facts or evidence do I have to provide to the court for the judge to award me physical and legal custody?
Does the court take it into concideration that the father of the my 5 mos. has been playing with my 8 y/o emotions?
If the father did a paternity test with my child without my concent, is that illegal?
1 Answer from Attorneys
You need to present all of your concerns in mediation. If he is creating a mentally unhealthy situation for your daughters, that needs to be brought out. While the mediator is supposed to be there trying to convince the two of you to come to an agreement, that mediator will also likely be making a recommendation to the court. In Orange County at least, they are likely to follow that. Try to focus your conversation on what is in the best interests of your daughter. I would voice the concerns about him leaving the state so that it can be put in the order that he is not to leave with the daughter.
You are not likely to obtain sole legal and sole physical custody based on the facts you have stated. The family law facilitator may be able to help you with some of these questions, but if you can find an attorney in your area to help you, I would do so.
If he signed the birth certificate, he doesn't need to prove he is the father, because he already is legally. He has a right to prove paternity, so that would be a useless battle unless you aren't sure he is the dad.
Pick your battles. With a new baby, you are going to wipe yourself out if you fight over things that are not going to give you much result in the long run. You are not likely to have him removed completely from your daughter's life, because that could have long term effects on your daughter and is not in her best interest. Formulate what you think would be a fair visitation schedule and present it to the mediator.
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