Legal Question in Sexual Harassment in California

Crush
I have had a crush on my Vice President for two years. For many months, I have thought he may have some mutual feelings for me. I left a voice mail for him at work, however, the voice mail was deleted, when our company moved over a weekend. Not knowing that the voice mail would be deleted. I felt so bad for leaving the voice mail that I called him at home to tell him and to tell him that I had this mad crush for 2 years. He has done nothing wrong and I respect him greatly. He is a wonderfull person and Vice President. He told me that he did not have the same feelings. I left the subject closed. On the next business day, the Human Relations dept contacted me and wanted to either understand my side or wanted me to understand that this Vice President did not have any feelings for me. From here, I feel that I have done something terribly wrong. Am I liable for sexual harrassment?

Asked on 8/20/02, 6:58 am

2 Answers from Attorneys

Michael Kirschbaum Law Offices of Michael R. Kirschbaum

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Re: Crush

It is not unusual for people who work together to develope feelings for another, which sometimes leads to romance and even marriage. There is nothing legally wrong with this. Relationships have to start somewhere.

Once the recipient of those feelings indicates that he is not interested, it is up to you to stop. One of the components of sexual harassment is that the advances must be unwelcome. You have now been put on notice that any advances by you are not welcome.

Any harassment must also be severe and pervasive. It is generally recognized that a one time incident, as you describe it, is not severe nor pervasive. Therefore, what you have done is not sexual harassment, as defined by law.

What you do from here is the key. You must learn to suppress your feelings and not act on them, or speak about them at work. You should be okay with your employer, if you do so.

Answered on 8/21/02, 1:07 pm

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