Legal Question in Family Law in Georgia
Hi, I'm looking for some advice on a potential separation which could lead to divorce (neither of which I want and hopefully won't happen).
The situation: My wife and I have hit a bad phase of our relationship and are caught in a cycle, we are thinking of separation to let things calm down. There is no substance or personal abuse, no infidelity either. Marriage counseling has not helped at least not now. We have had a couple of heated discussions where separation and divorce came up. We don't want to do anything drastic and do love each other, kids, etc. Just not 'in love' right now and the way we have been acting/talking, we don't even like each other right now. We have discussed taking a break/timeout from each other so we can let things cool off and start our friendship over again. Currently planning to live in the house in separate bedrooms for a month or so then check in with each other to see how we are feeling. Will work together on the house, kids, etc, be nice to each other, appreciative, etc. Just limited social time. Affection and intimacy have been out the door for about a year now (not completely but pretty rare).
We live in Cobb County, GA. I am the sole financial provider, she is the primary caretaker of our children, we have a nice house (in both our names), two young children, etc. I have no relatives close by. She has a mom whom she is close with in the next county (room for her and the kids, she owns her house no mortgage, but different county, schools, etc). Kids don't know anything yet and we're not sure what our direction is yet either. Only debt is the mortgage. All accounts are joint. Financially moving out would be a burden not to mention that I'd be the one to go; removing me from my house, environment, kids, normal life, etc.
"IF" we split, we have discussed that we would want to do it amicably knowing that we are connected for life due to the kids, etc. Would rather mediate than exhaust money on a legal battle.
My wife already expects that she'd have primary custody of the kids and I could see/spend time with them whenever I want. She is a great mom. Heck..she's a great person!
So my questions are around my situation and potentials on what to do at each phase if this progresses and I'm feeling like I am totally at a disadvantage...
Am I at a disadvantage? Anything to keep me from being at a disadvantage?
Is there anything I should consider prior to/for separation. Legal, financial, accounts, kids, life, etc.
Am I at a disadvantage if I leave the house to live someplace else?
Can I make her go to her mom's with or without the kids?
If we divorce, what about insurance, my work benefits, etc?
Are there guidelines for alimony and child support based on my earnings, benefits, etc?
Any financial implications if one person wants out and the other doesn't?
Any other advice or considerations would be helpful too.
Thank you
Signed,
Not quite ready to rock the boat...but the waters are getting rough!
3 Answers from Attorneys
Your questions require more information than you posted.
I'd be glad to set up an appointment and discuss your options. Call my office.
Your questions are far beyond the scope of this message board. There are plenty of lawyers who handle collaborative divorces in the area. Keep in mind that if you start seeing a lawyer and she finds out, she could view it as a first shot in a battle and she lawyers up in response. Be up front about it. As an aside, "not in love" is primarily a choice, not a feeling, as are "phases" and "cycles."
Your post contains a great deal of detail and you obviously have some concerns. You need to meet or at least call an attorney. Many offer free consultations.
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