Legal Question in Family Law in Georgia
here are some facts before the question. everyone lives in georgia. the baby, female, was born april 26 2011, i am not married to the baby's father, i am married to a man who was there through the pregnancy, birth, and has helped support this child throughout her life, we married on junuary 10th 2012. we encouraged the father to visit when he wanted even when i was pregnant. he did not do a dna in front of anyone he just swabbed her mouth. her father has just now filed for legitimization along with other things. he barely shows up, about twice a month for an hour or less each visit. he put us out of a hotel room when we went there for the baby when my a/c stopped working. his family neglects her because i am not married to him and she has my last name. his mother pulled a gun on me when i was first pregnant, told me to get out and she will shoot me because i told him i might be pregnant and i got called a liar among other awful names. i witnessed my father being murdered when i was 12. the babys father watched his mother kill a burgler when he was young. he threatened to try to take my custody away. he just recently started showing up a little more with $75 checks each time. i am unemployed and about to go to school, my husband works, i live with my mom who is a server heart patient. he is rude to my family, he tells my little 16 year old sister to shut the fxxx up, he looks in our windows, walks in rooms he is told not to, plain out rude. so upon reading all of that, can the biological father get the baby's last name changed and joint custody if he gets the baby legitimized? can i stop him from taking her off at least till she can talk? i do want her to know her father i just do not want him to change her last name or take her off until she can at least talk if something happens over there. what can i use to help myself in this situation? i am the defendant.
2 Answers from Attorneys
The answer is incredibly simple. The courts encourage men to step forward and legitimate (and support) children. Your best way to have a good outcome for the child, and that is the real purpose here, is to get a good lawyer within 30 days of being served. Don't do this pro se.
As for the child's name, and this is a tough one, aim for compromise (such as a hyphenated name or using his name as a middle name). Someone loses this issue in every case and that is the way to aim for a win-win.
If your goal is to prevent overnight visitations, your family history has no bearing on it. Judges will tend to encourage it although they may have someone work up to it depending on the facts. Discuss the best strategy with your lawyer. Attempting to deny most visitation can really backfire.
You need to get an attorney to assist you. There is the issue of custody, a parenting plan and child support to be resolved. If the Judge grants the legitimation, due to the child's age, I would at least request a graduated visitation schedule. The father has to exercise each level before advancing to the next. This allows the child to bond with and be comfortable with the father, and allows you time to see if the father is really interested in stepping up to the plate. Again, you really need legal assistance.
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