Legal Question in Family Law in Illinois

Hello..my boyfriend and I have been together since 2010 (have known each other since 2008) and now planning to get married next month (April 2012). We are very deeply in love and have been in a long-distance relationship all this time. I am an NRI and he is an Indian citizen. Also, I come from a hindu family and he comes from a muslim family. We know for a fact that our families are going to oppose this marriage. I am 30 now and he is 31. We talk to each other throughout the entire day everyday via phone and chat. It feels like we have created our own time zone and are living together virtually.

We are very responsible individuals (I am a Business Analyst for a hospital and he is a doctor) and very close to our parents. I have never-ever thought I would be doing something like marrying secretly; he would never do this either. My parents are getting very concerned about me since I'm not married yet and he has refused every single proposal his mother found for him. There is no way possible that we would do an arranged marriage! Our plan is to get married next month in India, then I will sponsor him as my spouse to the US, then after about one more year after he comes here, we will tell our parents.

I really don't want to hide and do this. We are well aware of the issues of religion in this case. We did not look at religion before falling in love. The biggest reason why we're delaying everything in our lives is because of our

parents. We have never hurt their feelings, but when they find out of the marriage, it is definitely going to be very bad; this is what I am afraid of. I cannot be with anyone else, but I do not want to hurt my parents either and the same 10months now, but goes for him as well.

Every single day is becoming even more stressful than the previous day. This is greatly effecting my job as well as his preparations for the Step1 and Step2 medical examination. We have not seen each other since 10months now, but have spoken on phone everyday including today. We do not want to hurt our parents, but we cannot live without each other. Please advise! Eagerly awaiting your response in this extremely sensitive situation. Thank you!!


Asked on 3/02/12, 11:41 pm

1 Answer from Attorneys
Sue Roberts-Kurpis, Esq. Law Office of Sue Roberts-Kurpis

Since you don't want to do what you know you have to do - what is the question? You are obviously not looking for advice, just validation. My suggestion is to either embrace your relationship, tell your parents, and be prepared for the consequences or break it off entirely. Right now you are sneaking around and denying yourself a life in exchange for a maybe.

Read more
Answered on 3/03/12, 10:42 am


Related Questions & Answers

More Family Law, Divorce, Child Custody and Adoption questions and answers in Illinois