Legal Question in Family Law in Illinois

Re: Visitation Denial

There is absolutely no such law in Maryland. Your wife may not deny visitation, in fact, her continued denial will reflect badly upon her in court when custody is ultimately determined.

The non-legal solution is to tell her that you've learned from a Maryland Family Law Attorney that if she continues to deny visitation a judge will use it against her when determining custody and that the attorney informed you that there is no such law regarding living with a girlfriend (absent showing that the live-in girlfriend poses a harm to the children) as an absolute bar to visitation. The only real remedy you have is a legal one, and that requires you to file for visitation (or custody if you prefer) with the court in Maryland, which will of course cost you legal fees.

Please call me at my office if you would like to discuss further.

Re: Visitation Denial

Your question didn't reach me soon enough to help with this summer, just ending, but maybe my answer can help in the future. There is no law such as the one your wife described. Furthermore, there is no law which gives her more right to custody than it gives to you. Until a court has issued an order granting one of you custody and the other visitation rights, your rights and hers are equal. The problem is how to exercise your rights without snatching your child away from his mother and without a difficult and expensive legal battle. You have several options: Since you have lived in Illinois for some time, you can file for divorce there, and ask for custody, or visitation, with your son. Your wife would then have either to come to Illinois to respond in an Illinois court or to file an answer in Illinois and try to get the case moved to Maryland. You could file for divorce in Maryland next November, when you have been separated two years (but that would be inconvenient and more costly for you). Or you could try to negotiate a separation agreement with your wife (a contract to live separate which resolves all issues between you and your wife, including property issues and custody, child support, and visitation) at a time when she is more reasonable. The agreement can then be the basis for an inexpensive, uncontested divorce which results in a court order about visitation. Once there is a court order, it becomes harder for her to change the rules and exercise control.

You would want a lawyer in Illinois to, at the least, check over the agreement and make sure that it is enforceable and in your interest. I suggest that you try to come up with enough money to at least consult with an Illinois lawyer about your options, and find out how much a lawyer's services will cost. Sometimes the cost is less than you might expect, and the longer you allow your wife to control the situation, the harder it will be to enforce your rights as a parent.