Legal Question in Family Law in Maryland

I was just involved in a csutody trial where a master presided. My exhusband and I have shared physical custody where he has 6 out of 14 overnights. I am re-married and my current husband is in the Navy and had orders to Texas. I was trying to get primary custody so that I could take my children with me and my husband to Teaxas for the school year. I offered my ex the whole of each summer as well as all winter break and spring break, as well as any other visitation that didnt affect their schooling. I also offered to pay for half of their flight back and forth and to pay to fly with them myself as they are 5 and 3. I also offered to cut his child support in half. I brought up many things in court as far as his lack of participation and so on to no avail. What really upsets me is that the Master told my lawyer at the pre-trial in chambers that he didn't believe in separating children from either parent for any reason and that I made a selfish decision by marrying a military man and now I need to deal with that decision. Long story short, during the trial, he heard my side, then took both lawyers in chambers. My lawyer was told that if I continued the trial he would grant my ex full custody. At that point of course I am then able to file an exception and then an appeal. But that would mean giving up custody of my children in the hopes of an appeal that may never happen. I was not willing to do that. So, i was told my only other option was to give up the case and end the trial in the middle so that I could keep custody the way its. I was being punished because my ex and his lawyer knew and told the master that I would never leave my children and that if he ruled against me, that I would end up staying here which was what they and the master wanted anyway.

Again, at the end of the trial he gave this whole long winded speech. My lawyer said, so you are saying that if you have a child in st marys county, you are expected to live here the rest of your life. And he said, until the child turns 18. He then told me that I made a selfish decision by marrying a man in the military and now it was time for me to concentrate on my children and put them first. He also said that I could go see my husband as much as i want. And that of course my ex would work with me in any way possible. We are forced to have two households on the same money as one and now the added expense of trying to fly to see each other.

My point to all this is that I was forced into a decison that I don't feel was fair beccause the Master was biased and had clearly made up his mind prior to the trial even beginning. And that My husband and I are being punished because we love each other and got married, and he is int he Navy as a cheif and serving his country.

So, do I have any options here? The only thing that we can think of ius to write letters to his senator from PA and in TX where he is now and in MD where the children and I reside. Any thoughts on this?


Asked on 9/01/09, 7:40 pm

1 Answer from Attorneys
Robert Sher Wagshal and Sher

I can understand your feelings regarding the fairness of the proceedings, but keep in mind that, as your lawyer probably told you, the issue before the master was what was in the best interest of the children. Many judges feel strongly about separating young children from a parent if there has been a close relationship between the children and that parent. Since you were sharing residential custody on an almost 50/50 basis, that was obviously the case. Of course, to suggest that a parent must be confined to a geographic area until a child reaches adulthood is absurd. On the other hand, in military families it's not unusual for the parent in the military to be away from the family for extended periods of time, especially nowadays.

Had you allowed the hearing to continue and then filed exceptions to the master's report, the status quo would have remained in effect until the final ruling by a judge on the exceptions. So you wouldn't have lost custody in the interim.

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Answered on 9/08/09, 3:45 pm


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