Legal Question in Family Law in Massachusetts

I'm a parent of a child almost 2 years of age. I was with an abusive boyfriend, who I had a relationship with for 3 years, also who is the biological father of my child. We have had and rocky relationship, but one night, from a dispute, he physically attacked me, and feared for my life, but I did not file a police report of the situation, which I do regret. All I wanted is to get away from him, so I picked up my bags and with my child, left him, and left the state (in Massachussets) to get away from him and be with my parents (in South Carolina), to start a new life for us, at least from what I thought because he would not let it go. He brought me to court in Mass for a custody battle. I tried seeking counseling and looking for advice from family advocate office in Mass, but I was denied help (in the 3 offices they refered me to) because his mother works in the offices, and I was told that it was a conflict of interest and I can't be helped. The outcome of the 1st court hearing, they voided the fact of abuse because I did not file a police report, so we were put in 6 mos probation because he didn't agree to any of the choices given to him, which the court made a decision for him. I have physical custody, and we have to make alternate travel every other month for visitation purposes (me going up to Mass, he coming down to S.C), also he is to pay child support in the mean time. I feel he's unfit to be a parent, the abuse I suffered (in front of the child) and he not being there for the child when I leave the child with him (he dumps our child to his mother for his benefits), unstable job situation, and missed payments of child support. But I did not refuse him for seeing his child. He feels that I neglect the child's interest, keeping him from seeing his child by running away. Ever since the terms from the 1st hearing, I had a temporary job, at least to make money to support me and my child, but I have to take time off just to make travel so that he can have visitation according to the agreement. He's has been harrassing me sending me offensive messages and calling me to tell me that I'm a horrible person for putting him through this. It is very unfortunate that I do not have any support or more importantly advice, because of 'conflict of interest' due to his mother's influence of her employment. Just had my second hearing, and he had a lawyer present his case (from his mother's employment), me going in alone (thought I was prepared for this). I presented my case, and the judge told me 'I should of thought of this before I left and ran away'. The court ordered for an extension, next hearing in Dec. I still have physical custody, but the court ordered that I will have to travel twice to Mass for his visitation rights (he does not have to travel to S.C-I have to travel up there). I do not have the funds to keep traveling, and to keep taking time off if I was working. I just don't know what to do, because I want for what's best of my child. It's unhealthy for both myself and my child to keep traveling (twice a month now), me not having a stable source of income because of traveling (just relying on child support). I'm willing to try to make arrangments to have a lawyer on my behalf, but its hard without a stable source of income. He's refusing me to support my child to keep dragging this on. I need help, but I just don't know what to do....

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