Legal Question in Family Law in Massachusetts
visitation/vacation time
I have sole physical custody of a 13 and 17 y/o. My ex has visitation rights of two days/week 5-9PM and a full weekend/month along with two other weekends/month that are split between us. We each are required to supply the other with a 3 week vacation schedule for the following calendar year by 12/1 each year to be taken during school vacations and summer months. I supply him with my schedule each year, however, he hasn't met the deadline of 12/2 this year or last. He thinks it not practical, so waits until April/May to supply it. This past Chritmas vacation as well as this April school vacation, he has wanted the children to 'SPLIT' time between the households. For instance, this April vaca, he asked the week before for two extra days in addition to his regular visitation. I said fine, but that those 2 days would be considered vacation days (of the 21 days he has available each year according to the agreement. He says I should cooperate and allow those days as non-vacation days or he is going to court to have the agreement altered to his liking. Mind you, I still do not have his vaca schedule for 2007, mine submitted although amended twice bec of camp conflicts. Will the court amend an order esp since he is in contempt?
2 Answers from Attorneys
Re: visitation/vacation time
This sounds more like a passive-aggressive power struggle than a fight you really need to have. He yanks your chain; you supply the desired noise, making you the bad guy. He of course does not consider this "yanking the chain."
Given the age of the two children, an extra day here and there is quite reasonable, assuming they want it. Conversely, the 17-year-old has long since reached the age at which he/she has a lot to say about the time spent with either of you.
This is not about counting days. Twenty-three days does not hurt you, so far as I can see. You can well afford to shrug and say, "Sure."
However, the notice given must be reasonable under all of the circumstances. He cannot arrange his summer vacation to conflict with camp for which you have paid in reliance on the December 1 deadline for scheduling. Should he do so, he should reimburse you the cost of missed camp.
I urge that the two of you engage a mediator instead of engaging in senseless court battles. It will cost less, and probably produce the same result.
: visitation/vacation time
His view is little short of extortion. He seems to want to re-write the schedule and the order to his liking. It is one thing to submit a schedule and then modify it. It is another not to submit anything.
I am not sure mediation would work in this situation. Although if it could, it should be used as a first line of action or reaction.
Under these facts, I am not sure what your ex can use as his basis for a contempt action. It is almost as if as long as you accommodate, he will be nice. That is not cooperation.
I believe you may have to fight back, and call his bluff.
This is not passive-aggression. This is aggressive manipulation.
Should you have any questions, or need assistance, contact me.
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