Legal Question in Family Law in Missouri

When I was 6 months pregnant me and my babys biological father broke up and he said that he knew the child wasnt his, at 7 months pregnant I was with a new guy and he was there from that point on through the birthing process and still to this day is here. My son is now 9 months old his biological father doesnt even acknowlage his exsitance unless he has to. My son already calls my fiaonce (the guy thats been there since I was 7 months pregnant) his daddy, when my fiaonce got my sons initals tattoo'd on his chest my sons biological father said he didnt care because the baby wasnt his and could be anyones. Even since the dna results have came in he has denied my son to alot of people and many people could tell you he is to immature to care for a child. My fiaonce has been in quite and bit of trouble but nothing involving and child and so has my sons biological father but his biological father wants to say hes going to make it to ware my fiaonce cant see my son. He doesnt acknowlege my sons exsitance untill someone else brings up the matter and everyone has been recently calling him a bad father so now he wants to try and be there in his life. I dont want my son confused on who his "dad" is and who his "father" is. I would rather him not be in my sons life at all. he didnt want to in the first place and hasnt for the last 9 months why change that now? Can he get custody rights to my son? or make it to ware my fiaonce can not see him?


Asked on 3/03/11, 9:20 am

1 Answer from Attorneys

Anthony Smith LawSmith

As a biological parent, men have certain obligations to provide support, etc. for their child. They also have parental rights. Until those right ans obligations are extinguished, they father can seek modifications in support, visitation and cudtody orders. Unfortunately, if the biolgocial mother allows the chidl to believe that her boyfriend is the child's father, it can be used by the father against her in Motions to establish or modify custody or visitation.

Fortunately, your chidl is only nine months old, and therefore has not been damaged. You and yrou boyrfriend are nto married, and he apparently has chosen not to adopt your child. Therefore, lying to your child can only do harm down the road. The popular technical term is "parental alienation syndrome" More and more courts are taking chidlren away from otherwise wonderful mothers for lying to their child about their father.

Your ex will probably not be able to get an Order that disallows the child to be around your boyfriend. That is, if the crimes that yrou boyrfreind has been accused or convicted of are as minor as you say.

Be honest with your child to the extent that is appropriate for their age. But do not mislead the child as to the identity of his biological father, now that DNA testing has determined that. You may be safe explaining how you see a difference between Father and Daddy.

Good luck

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Answered on 3/03/11, 11:21 am


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