Legal Question in Family Law in Missouri

I have been divorced for nearly 15 years. for as long as 10 of those years i have done my part in staying true to the letter of that decree. then about 6 six years ago i was in a very serious automobile accident that incompassitated me to where i cannot do the work that i was use to doing. since the accident social security has been sending money for my daughters support because of my disability. i thought that every thing was going fairly well until about 2 years after i was released from the serious medical care. the ex-wife hase been relentless on asking me to resume my portion of the co-pays and more support money than what she is already receiving, which is over $600 a month. this is much more than what i would normally send her when i was working...$475 plus what i could send her for co-pays (this would be on what she would tell me what she wants without sending me copies of the bills). i have been telling her that my income now is barely enough for me to survive on...my bills come first and sometimes i have to give less to one company to send the proper amount to the other.

well if that wasn't enough, my daughter that i thought was getting along fairly well talking over the phone, she starts on me with the assumption that daddy has all this money, starts asking me for things that are beyond my capable hands. things like high-end jeans, purses, shoes and perfume. i have had to tell her "NO" many times, hearing her disappointment over the phone. i hav eonly seen my daughter 5 or 6 times in the last 6 years. this is because her mom moved across the state so that she could be with her family since they all had moved there after we got married. so i have tried to encourage my ex-wife to please travel to visit me for my birthday and christmas every year. but the ex would only bend a couple of times and the last time was with a agenda...to ask for money to help her out for the situation that she has put herself into...which was exceding her means to give her daughter what she wants. of course i am still not working and i am going to college to hopefully get back on the work force...i hope that i can??

i found out that my daughters recital has a father-daughter dance. i got this info and to see what i would need to prepare myself for the task od dancing, by calling the dance school. the ex thought that i was conspiring against her when she heard what i did. then she asked how i was getting the money to rent the tux and my daughters dress. i told her that i was taking it out of the money that i would have for my car insurance for the second term of my policy. then she started on saying that well your daughter has decided to ask her uncle to dance with her at that recital. and on top of that she still insisted that i send that money i was going to use to her. i was heart-broken and did not answer her on the subject. i called my daughter the next day, just to get the story staight from her. she confirmed her actions but also told me that she had decided that i would not be the one to walk her down the ailse when she would get married. i had to hang up ..i just could not handle the crap that was being thrown at me. it has been over three weeks since that event and out of the blue my daughter calls and askes me to help her buy a different car because the one she had is basically unrepairable. i basicall told her that it was not my problem and that she should of known that i was in no position financially to help anyone.

So here is my question and quandry. i want to modify my divorce decree to not only lower the amount of the child support if not eliminate it altogether, but also have the section of the decree that now obligates me to the college tuition, books and possible other expenses plus eliminate the 50% of the co-pays. i feel that i have been dismissed as being a father by all levels. if that is how i am to be treated then i want all ties severed.

our divorced was in St. Louis county in Missouri. please let me know if i justification to do this....and also please recommend a lawyer to handle my case. it is not my fault that i am in this condition. i should be treated better. but now its too late...i want them to see what happens after consequences that i have suffered by them.


Asked on 3/04/10, 3:44 pm

1 Answer from Attorneys
Michael R. Nack Michael R. Nack, Attorney at Law

Depending upon the facts, you might succeed on a Motion to Modify seeking to lower the child support, but the other things you ask about are not likely to be awarded by any Judge in St. Louis County. Most attorneys will require a retainer fee in the ballpark of $2500 or more and bill at the rate of $200 per hour or higher. You would also have to pay the filing fees and any other costs incurred. If you know your ex-wife's income and all of the other necessary information, an attorney could help you run a current form 14 to see whether it might make economic sense to file a Motion to Modify.

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Answered on 3/10/10, 6:51 pm


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