Legal Question in Family Law in New Jersey
father trying to get custody
My friend has been seperated from his wife for almost 14 months and is working toward a divorce. His wife however is telling him that if he files that she will take away his son, who is 4. At this time the child resides with his father 5 days a week, as the mother works nights by choice. He believes New Jersey judges only choose the mother's side and is now afraid of divorce. What can I say to convince him otherwise? Does New Jersey really favor the mother in all cases? Especially where the father is so deeply involved in his child's life?
2 Answers from Attorneys
Re: father trying to get custody
You are asking a rather complex question. The courts favor joint custody and equal sharing of time of the children by the parents. The courts want the child or children to have two parents and to grow up feeling that way.
What happens is that the father usually spends his time working and equal time sharing is not feasible.
A parent who is not nurthering and involved in parenting is at a great disadvantage in a battle for custody, but barring illegal and improper conduct on the part of one of the parents both parents start off on an equal footing. Fathers who demand and make provisions to be able to handle equal sharing of time with the children usually get exactly that.
A parent who is negligent or abusive is greatly handicapped in obtaining equal treatment in terms of time with the children. If the father is going to dump the children on his mother or family and be absent while working or socializing elsewhere he is not going to achieve equal sharing of time with the child or children. Domestic violence issues and the use of illicit drugs and alcohol tilt the level playing field.
That is the basic story but there is much more that must be dealt with in approaching the issue of child custody.
Your friend has the children most of the time for now and at this point has a great opportunity to demonstrate his parenting skills and willingness to put in the time and effort to actually be a nurturing parent or he can blow the opportunity for reasons such as the demands of a job or social committments or a lack of a true disposition to be a full time, hands on parent.
Your friend should come and talk to me.
Gary Moore, Esquire
Hackensack,New Jersey
800 273 7933
www.garymooreattorneyatlaw.com
Re: father trying to get custody
Courts in New Jersey do not favor either parent. They focus on the best interests of the children. Rarely do the courts choose one parent to have "custody" over another. These days many parents share custody of their children. Its not the label of custody that matters, it is the time that both parents spend with the children that the Court focuses on. If you would like more information regarding this issue, please feel free to contact my secretary Debbie at 856-795-6700 to schedule a consultation.
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