Legal Question in Family Law in New Mexico

Tell the judge why you didn't go. When you filed your case (you don't say - is a a paternity case?) you should have gotten a temporary domestic order (TDO). You can request an order to show cause to hold him in contempt of that order. If there is no TDO then you can file for a restraining order against father. The forms to do that are on line in a lot of the courts in New Mexico.

I can't guarantee you can "beat this" but remember the judge is interested in getting the custody settled and not in punishing people, so promise to go to the mediation - and then go.