Legal Question in Family Law in New Mexico

There are three levels of mediation: Mediation, Priority Consultation, and Advisory Consultation. In mediation the mediator tries to get the two of you to agree on a parenting plan by helping you to work out your differences. You don't have to agree to whatever the mediator works out, and she will write up a parenting plan and ask you both to agree to it. If you can't agree then the court may order the next level.

In the other two the consultant holds a hearing and makes recommendations to the judge that are generally adopted by the judge so you want to be careful to make your points to the person conducting the consultation (the consultant).

Just be prepared to tell your story. Start by telling the consultant what you want: for example, you may be asking for Joint Legal Custody with primary physical custody in you, and visitation for the father. Give the history of the children with the other parent, the arrangements you have made for schooling or day care, your financial situation and need for child support. Describe your home and the resources you have for the children - does each have their own bedroom, their own bed, dresser, toys, etc.

If the father has been abusive or neglectful of the children say that, and whether you believe the father has the resources to care for the children - does he live in a tent or a palace? If the father has been abusive or neglected the children or has a drug problem you can get the court to order supervised visitation at places that are set up to do that.

Just be honest with the consultant and say what's on your mind. You may be nervous so write a list of the points that you want to make and use that when you're talking. Answer questions and be prepared to respond to what the father says, especially if he does not tell the truth. This is about the children, so try to keep from going into the history of your relationship, the consultant will just want to hear about how prepared each of you is to give the children what they need.

Remember this: the courts want the children to have relationships with both of their parents if it is at all possible without endangering the children. The way the time is divided between the parents is pretty much dependent on the ages of the children. The self-help center in the courthouse has a brochure that explains this. Your job is to give the court the information it needs to fulfill this goal.

You seem very conscientious so you should do well. If I can answer more questions please feel free to give me a call.