Legal Question in Family Law in New Mexico

my husband and i live apart. we have been married 34yrs and have lived apart since 2000. im retired after 21yrs at white sands missile range nm due to accident at work. i receive my pension and support myself entirely as far as finance is concerned. the house im dwelling in for the past 5 and half years by myself.i pay my own way with bills. he does not support me financially nor does he want to. he has a very good paying job with federal govt. same place i worked. he's eligible for retirement in about 1 to 1 1/2 yrs. the house was up for sale when owner died and i got first choice and he borrowed against his retirement to buy place. i am paying back the loan so he can retire on time and we were talking about living together again. now that its time for him to move in its like i have no say in anything. concerning our reunion or life in general. besides being rude and possessive he is outrite a bully. im paying the loan but he thinks because the loan was from his retirement i have no say in any matters except domestics. im really confused. he was not this way before but we have been living apart since 2000 and has changed and i guess so have i. im medically retired due to accident at work and support myself entirely. i just didnt have the money at the moment to buy the place outrite. he is abussive mentally, verbally and sometimes physycally but i have never reported him since it would cost him his job. i need to know where and how i stand legally. he gets paid twice monthly and his net pay is 3-4 times my net monthly pay.i thought we could maybe work thins out but now im really worried. im a senior and dont really need more stressful problems in my life.of course h has lived the life of a bachlor for a while also and i dont think hes gonna change now. where do i stand if i dont want him in? being the fact that he put up the money rite now hes bullying me that i cant stop him. im afraid its gonna get nasty. any good advice? i guess i need a lawyer out here but i would like to know where i stand. being paid only monthly i would have to wait till next month to procure a lawyer so your advice is desperately sought . please respond and if you can advice me to a good lawyer out here i guess let me know. i wanted to settle this in a better mode but looks im not getting any favorable solution.life is too short for any more problems. i put no demands on him especially financially but maybe that has been a mistake of mine. awaiting your response, i remain yours truly aurea e. allen

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