Legal Question in Family Law in New Mexico
My husband and I were living in Tulsa, Oklahoma. My husband ended up abandoning me in Tulsa and came back to our hometown of Alamogordo, New Mexico to be with his ex girlfriend. I had no knowledge of his leaving until the next afternoon when his work told me he had left. He called me later that night, told me he had left me for his ex girlfriend and that he wanted a divorce. The day after that i found out i was pregnant and called my husband to tell him. He told me to abort the baby and that he wanted nothing to do with either of us. I told him i would not abort the baby. A few weeks later i ended up moving back to our hometown of Alamogordo, New Mexico to have the help of my family with my pregnancy. I got straight into the doctor, have gone to all my prenatal appointments, have done some parenting classes, have since then got on medicaid and WIC, i have also applied for food stamps and started working as a substitute teacher. My husband has blocked me from his social networking site and blocked me from calling his phone. However, I have notified him by his email... I have invited my husband to every appointment and sent him ultrasound pictures, and he has decided to neither show up or respond to anything. I have documented all these attempts with their date, time, and what was said. I have also invited his mother to everything, she never came to anything either. During this time my husband has not worked. Him and his mother also took my car, which was in his mothers name, but that i made the payments on. Therefore making it more difficult for me to get to appointments or work. I have also had friends of mine come up and tell me that my husband is denying the baby. So, with everything he has done... With him abandoning me, not helping with anything, and denying the baby... If he wanted custody at some point would the courts grant that to him or would he be considered unfit? Does it make a difference that we are married? And what proof would i need to show that he is unfit?
2 Answers from Attorneys
You obviously need to discuss this with an attorney.
He will be presumed to be the father of the child. If he denies it you can get an adjudication of paternity based on results of tests. He will have to pay child support. You can get a divorce and adjudicate the child support and custody just like anybody else. Custody and visitation are determined based on the best interests of the child, which would depend on his status and the interest in the child.
I really advise you to get an attorney to help you with this. You and your child have rights and and an attorney can help you get them. If you are on any kind of assistance from the state the Child Support and Enforcement Division (CSED) can help you get child support.
The Alamogordo District Court has recently opened a self help center. They can point you to local attorneys and the legal area of the law, along with some forms, so that you can get this matter moving forward, legally. You can read about this area of law by looking at this URL http://www.uslegalforms.com/paternity/new-mexico-paternity-forms.htm and you can search for Uniform Parentage Act in New Mexico and you will find specific answers to the question you asked.
As Mr. Chandler previously wrote - it sounds like you may want to seek a divorce and have these legal matters addressed in that arena. This is not a fun part of life but often a necessary part.
Good Luck.
Law Guru
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