brother abusing elderly parents finances
My mother passed away a year ago. My father is 78 and has dementia. My sister and I, who both live out of state, agreed it would be best to leave Dad in his home in NY and our brother agreed to care for him there. My father's pension and social security amounts to $7500.00 a month. It was agreed that he would receive $3000 a month to care for him and the rest of the finances would go back into the trust that is to be split 3 ways when he passes away. My parents expenses while they were together amounted to $2000.00 a month. Their house is paid for. For the past year that our brother has cared for our father he has spent every penny of his monthtly income and will not send either one of us statements when asked. We feel he is abusing our father's finances and need to know how to stop his excess spending. He also took $25,000 out of the trust illegally and spent that also and feels he doesn't need to pay it back because he is taking care of our father. What can we do to prevent him from spending all our father's money. He won't even share when we are in need. I have a wife and 4 kids and would be willing to have dad come live with us. How do we go about getting custody of Dad when we have no extra money for an attorney
1 Answer from Attorneys
Re: brother abusing elderly parents finances
I'm sorry to hear of mom's passing and your current troubles with your brother and dad. Unfortunately from 1,000 miles away and no money to pay a lawyer, I don't see a lot of realistic options for you. Did dad sign a power of attorney when he had capacity? Who is the trustee of the trust? How is your brother providing care for someone who has dementia? You can try calling Adult Protective Services in the county where dad lives, and ask them to send someone over to investigate. That may get something started.
Good luck.
Rick Bryan
New York, NY
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