Legal Question in Elder Law in New York

Re: Durable POA for elderly parents

You cannot dictate to, "tell" or "order" either of your parents to do anything, re giving you a POA. Further, you cannot decide to handle your parents personal or financial matters, anymore than your siblings can, if your parent's individually, did not ask you to do same, without you prompting or pressuring them.

Notwithstanding your belief, that you are the best person for the job. It is your parent's relationship and trust with the person THEY choose to give their POA power and authority over the business of THEIR life, that is of paramount concern.

Thus, per the circumstances you describe, it is your tone, posturing or proposed conduct that would likely be construed as "undue influence."

Please note that except for the particular nature or quality of relationship you and a sibling may or may not have with your parent/s, before the court, you and your siblings are equal to each other with respect to your parents, (of the whole blood).

Suggest: discuss with your parents individually,(emphasis "discuss") what they want. If they have already made provisions, that you disagree with, do not try to change their arrangements to suit yourself. For surely, your siblings will be as adamant as you are and easily be able to show your "undue influence."

Good luck,

Phroska