Legal Question in Family Law in New York
Why is my Attorney Bullying?
Why is my Attorney Bullying?
- I am in the midst of a crazy divorce case. I got rid of one attorney because he would contradict himself and answer my questions differently on any given day.
- My new attorney started off with a good attitude. He is well respected and experienced. Soon after the initial meeting he started being short with me. He would not return calls. At our Preliminary Conference he showed up late, met with my wifes attorney, they went into a room without my wife or myself. This is how my first attorney did things. I told him that I wanted to be in this conference, he said no, I said..Isn't it my right ? He said yes but your not coming in. When he brought us in he sat there and said nothing. I asked the Referee for a moment to speak with my attorney...(I had no idea of what was going on) We met in the hallway where he basically told me that if I didn't agree with him that I should find another attorney.
Why does this keep happening?? This what my last attorney did and he just systematically gave away my case.
What is my recourse? How do I get back control without my attorney quitting? I do not want to appear troublesome to the Special Referee but I have know idea what they are doing
HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2 Answers from Attorneys
Re: Why is my Attorney Bullying?
Since It is usually and primarily the craziness of the divorcing parties, that makes for a "crazy divorce," NOt the lawyers.
It is my impression that it is you, who is and has been trying to "Bully" your lawyers for a variety of reasons. Reasons, that have little to do with expediting resolution of your divorce and the ancillary issues.
Often divorce is the most traumatic experience of a persons life. People often feel that virtually everything and everyone is out of their control. The process and their life. They try to deflect the hurt; and look everywhere except at themselves for the reason for their dissappointment, dissallusion and pain.
Best Advice: Get short term counseling to help get through this divorce and refocus your life.
Learn to be more self critical; and learn to be more patient, thoughtful and considerate of all parties concerned and involved in this proceeding.
Advice most likely to take: aggravate lawyer until lawyer dumps you, get another, then represent self until judge or Ref scares you by behaving nearly identical to the way your prior lawyers behaved.
GOOD LUCK,
PHROSKA L. McALISTER,ESQ
Re: Why is my Attorney Bullying?
It is difficult to say precisely what is causing your difficulty. Certainly, there are many attorneys who do not adequately discuss things with their clients. Frequently, they are moderately or low-priced and make their money more on volume than on the quality of their services. If you are going to take up too much of their time, they feel that they are not be paid enough and act accordingly. On the other hand, it is possible that you are being unreasonable, or even foolish. You must realize that lawyers must contend with the law as it is - they cannot change the law (except under rare circumstances in rare types of cases). Sometimes, it is beneficial to obtain a second opinion regarding the advice that you are being given. NO MATTER WHAT, NEVER ACCEPT BULLYING - INSIST UPON EXPLANATIONS AND, IF YOU CAN AFFORD IT, DO NOT ACCEPT A SETTLEMENT THAT YOU DO NOT AGREE WITH. Bear in mind that if your case cannot be settled you must go to trial and trials are very expensive!!
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