Legal Question in Family Law in New York

You may put in a petition for an order modifying your child support obligation if your son turns 21 years old or if he becomes "emancipated" prior to that time. In your case, it would be difficult to argue that your son is "emancipated" because he stills lives with his mother and is not employed on a full-time basis (and is not engaged in full-time service in the military, married, etc.)

It is also highly unlikely that the court will grant you the right to pay him directly. If the court believes that he still needs to be supported, then his mother will still be considered the parent who must actually provide food, shelter and other necessities. In other words, if the court determines that he is not acting as an independent adult, then you are required to pay the person he is "dependent upon": his mother.