Legal Question in Family Law in New York
visitation and children that refuse to see the ex
I am a divorced father with custodial custody of my 2 children ages 12 and 14. I have custody based on the courts decision that their mother abandoned us for another man. My ex has been given visitation rights and as per the settlement entitiled to a set scheduale. However, my children want nothing to do with her, the very mention that she wants to see them sends them into a panic and a state of depression which takes days if not weeks to correct. Since the start of the divorce preceedings she has only seen them maybe ten times, and she lives only moments away. She makes no effort to see them now, but constantly threatens to enforce her rights, which she is aware of will only cause them more harm than good. They wont call her, dont speak of her and again loath the very mention of her.
My question is do they have to see her if it effecting their mental well being and how can I prevent this from happening. The children have stated they will rebel against her, they have spoken about hurting themselves should they have to see her, and even running away when with her. I cant allow this to happen, can I do anything legally to stop her from seeing them under these circumstances.
2 Answers from Attorneys
Re: visitation and children that refuse to see the ex
You should consider going to family court to have supervised visitation and a psychological evaluation of the consequence of the visitation on the children
Re: visitation and children that refuse to see the ex
It is difficult to imagine why a child would not want to see their parent. It sounds like they may have somehow become entangled in the discord between you and your ex-spouse.
Children love their parents equally, and it is extremely difficult for them to experience the pain their parents are suffering. When one parent moves out, the children must be reminded that it has nothing to do with them.
I would recommend counseling for everyone, including you.
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