Legal Question in Family Law in North Carolina
1. I had my first child in 200 i was 14 and my 2nd child in 2002 i was 16.
2. I was married to their father, but things went really bad. I was basically rescued one night it was really bad. I went somewhere with my children, the father called police, the place wasnt quite fit, it was a fixer upper and the police officer said that the children should go somewhere for a bit until i secured another place. My husbands brother and his fiancee offered for the kids to stay there until i did this. a few weeks went by and i had got a trailer but it still wasnt good enough, i couldnt tell you why i dont remember. But I went over to see my children and when i got there, my husband and his family along with someone from social services was sitting at the table and told me if i didnt sign temporary custody papers that my children would be placed in foster care. so i signed. now for a long time there wasnt visitation and then there was. feeling guilty and being told things like my son needs stability and seeing me only causes him to act out more. struggled alot with what am i suppose to. i did have another daughter in 2003 who is still with me, so apparently im a fit parent. These temporary custody papers, im not 16 anymore, im not a bad mom, i want my kids in my life, im so sick of being told i cant see them or talk to them without permission from her, the fiancee who isnt even the fiancee anymore. my kids are with this woman who isnt even family. Last time i went to see a lawyer he told me that i needed 1000 to start things. I dont have that laying around, i struggle bad. What can I do? any advice would be appreciated.
1 Answer from Attorneys
Its hard to say what you can do without knowing more about your situation. However, there is one thing that you can do for free that may help and that is do what you should have done back when you were 14 - that's grow up, get some education and start making good choices in your life. You may not be a bad mother especially now at 27ish but in a lot of ways you are worse than a bad mother - you are an irresponsible mother. You seem to believe you have done nothing wrong and these awful things have just happened to you as if you just have bad luck or something. You made a horribly wrong choice to have children while still a child yourself not once, not twice but three times and these awful things that have happened since are a direct result of your poor choices. Until you come to grips with that, start taking responsibility for your actions and start making good choices you will continue to go through life 'struggling bad'.
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