Legal Question in Family Law in North Carolina
My divorce was finalized in 2014 after a year of legal separation. The reason for my divorce was due to infidelity on my behalf. During our 20 years of marriage we had 2 daughters whom are now 18 and 20. Immediately after our divorce was finalized I started to notice our daughter's behavior towards me started to change they started to become very disrespectful towards me and nothing that I said or did was ever right in their eyes and their talk and behavior towards me was as though I was not their parent and they would gravitate towards their father for everything. I felt as though it was those 3 against me. Well this past weekend when my eldest daughter came over to visit me from college she finally revealed to me why her and her younger sister had so much resentment towards me for the last 3 years. She stated that their father had revealed to them what I had done, and had also went into detail about what he had did to find out about my infidelity, and that he is always speaking negatively of me to them on a regular basis. She stated to me that she did not understand why he had to reveal to them what happened, and that how proud she was of me for never bad mouthing him to them no matter what happened, and that she wished that he would have did the same. She hugged me and told me that she felt bad of how she had treated me for the last 3 years. I told her that she does not understand the mental anguish that I have went thorough over the last several years due to their dad getting them involved and trying to turn them against me. I also told her that our divorce attorney specifically informed us not to get them involved so that negative opinions wouldn't be formed by the them. Our kids know that during our marriage I was and excellent mother. I know what I did was wrong and felt that it only happened because I felt unappreciated, unloved and taken for granted at the time. Is there grounds to sue?
1 Answer from Attorneys
What would you sue for? Custody is moot - the children have aged out. Are you saying you want money or your proverbial pound of flesh for mental anguish because your children formed a bad opinion of you based on being told things you did? At this point, you are likely better off just being grateful that your children have realized you took the high road regarding bad mouthing. Bottom line, the way I see it based on your description, you cheated, the marriage ended because of it, your ex was likely hurt by it and made a bad decision to tell the children likely in a purposeful attempt to get back at you in some way. You striking back with a law suit, would more likely than not just open things back up for the children and cause more hurt / confusion for them. However, it never hurts to sit down with a local family law attorney who can go over your situation in more detail and provide you with all your options.
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