Legal Question in Family Law in Pennsylvania

Hi. My ex boyfriend and I broke up in December, and he has consistently tried to contact me. I filed a PFA against him yesterday, and the magistrate signed it. He should be served today. I have dealt with non stop text messaged from my ex - calling me all sorts of vulgar names, threatening to show up at my current boyfriend's house, and told me that he will "never go away". The final straw was when he sent me a text on February 20th. He said that he left "presents" at my house, and I warned him not to ever set foot near my house again or contact me or I will indeed file a PFA and that I would not be home until Monday, so I wouldn't get the "presents" anyway. He then replied with "See you Monday night". It scared me so much. I came home on Monday to find a smashed ceramic pot on my front steps that I had once given him. An award I had left at his house was also on the steps, which he burnt severely and wrote "Here's your award." on with a marker. The next day, I woke up to text messaged from him just saying "hey." over and over. I then received a text message from my current boyfriend, telling me that my ex had contacted him on Facebook. I had blocked my ex from my Facebook in December, so I was clueless as to how he found out who I was dating. I later found out that he created a fake Facebook page under a different name and searched for me that way. I then filed a PFA after those incidents in fear of my safety, as well as my current boyfriend's and parent's safety. He has threatened to hit me before, but has never touched me. He carries a pocket knife on him at all times, which I listed in the PFA. He is also taking Percocet illegally, which makes him extremely verbally abusive and lose his inhibitions, as I was dating him at a time when he was addicted to Percocet. He has started drinking heavily almost every day of the week, according to the last time I actually had a conversation with him. I have saved numerous text messages from him, and have them printed. They are mainly him calling me vulgar names, insulting me, saying that he's going to show up at my boyfriend's house, and texts from the most recent incident when he left items on my porch. I was just curious as to what my standing is in this case. At the court hearing, do I have a well enough case to get a long term restraining order issued? If so, how long do you think it would last? Also, if he breaks the PFA and contacts me, do I call the police immediately? Even if he is just contacting me through text messages? And lastly, if he was to contact my current boyfriend, would that be violating the PFA since he can be considered a third person? I don't know if it is relevant, but I am 17 years old and my ex is 18, soon to be 19. Thank you so much.


Asked on 2/24/11, 5:26 pm

1 Answer from Attorneys
Michael Greenstein Greenstein Family Law Services, P.C.

First: DOCUMENT EVERYTHING. Photos, photos, photos, including clear photos of the text messages he has left you along with their time-and-date stamps (printouts will also be helpful, if possible, but sometimes they are difficult). My motto is, "If you can't show it, you don't know it," because "showing it" takes you out of the realm of he-said-she-said, and into the real of solid proof.

Second: FOLLOW THROUGH. Don't go after an emergency PFA and then drop the matter in hope that he 'got the message.' Emergency PFAs only last until the next court business day, and that's the day you had better be in the courtroom pursuing a temporary PFA through normal channels, followed by a hearing.

Third: ENFORCE THE PFA. It's just paper, unless you enforce it. If he breaks the PFA and contacts you in a way you can prove (i.e., more text messages, broken items that were in his possession on your front porch), yes, call the police immediately. No contact means NO contact. Obviously he HASN'T 'got the message' after all, and is ignoring reasonable restrictions. You might have your boyfriend warn him off the first time, if you're feeling charitable and think he'll get the message, but if he persists call the police.

Whether you have enough evidence to get a PFA is up to the judge, but certainly the behavior you describe is at least harassment, and at most a threat of violence. You've taken the step to protect yourself. Don't do it by halves.

Attorney Michael B. Greenstein

http://www.spousealouse.com

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Answered on 2/24/11, 6:08 pm


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