Legal Question in Family Law in Pennsylvania

Hello,

I married my husband in Sept., 2011. He has only worked a total of about 2 months since we got married. I pay all the bills. He is very verbally abusive. He tries to guilt me into buying cigarettes, energy drinks and anything and everything for him. If I don't, he will whine and keep pestering me until he gets his way. He is always asking his mother for money and she gives it him. He is constantly putting me down. He is always accusing me of cheating on him or being interested in other guys. After everything I've gone through with him, another man is the least of my concerns. I work a full-time job, and a part-time job just to pay the bills. The only thing he is good for is cooking dinner every night, doing laundry, cleaning half-assed and being able to lift heavy things when necessary (that's not very often obviously).

He is 37 years old and I am almost 26. I was naive when I entered into this marriage and didn't realize that I would be the sole provider. I have an 8 year old daughter from a previous relationship who sees all of this going on. He is not physically abusive to either of us.

I am sick of trying to provide for my daughter, myself and this 37-year-old child and being put down the whole time on top of that.

He refuses to go through with an uncontested divorce. In between nasty comments he says he loves me and that we just need to communicate.

Communication stopped a long time ago when I realized that all that was accomplished was more promises to be broken or just playing the blame game. We've slept in the same bed a total of no more than 1 month since we've been married. We were dating for several years before we got married and for some reason I never saw him for what he is. A mooching drama-queen.

We have no children together. Both of our names are on the rental agreement to the condo we live in. He doesn't own a car, and mine was signed over as a "gift" from my sister this past May. I am paying Aaron's Rental company for the TV and couch and it is only in my name. The cell phone's are in my name. The car insurance is in my name. The electric is in his name (he gets money from his mom each month to pay it). All of the furniture in the condo is mine that I bought. Other than some small things, like DVD's or pictures are both of ours.

We have no other assets together other than the signing of the lease which is up November 1, 2011. I want to sign it without him.

So, I have 2 questions.

1. How do I file for a divorce since it won't be uncontested. Or should I try to file uncontested and go from there? He might actually just give in once he realizes I'm serious. Either way, where is the cheapest place to get the paperwork needed to file in PA?

2. Is it legal to re-sign my condo lease come November 1 without him on it? Or does he have to agree to that?

Thank you for your help. I'm just trying to rid the trash in my life and move on for the sake of my little girl and my own personal sanity. Needless to say, I won't be making this mistake twice. I only make about $25,000/year. I'm just starting to be able to save about $50 out of each paycheck and I can't afford to hire a lawyer. He's sucking me dry.

Thank You,

HP


Asked on 8/30/11, 12:35 pm

1 Answer from Attorneys

He has to consent if you want to get a divorce in 90 days. Otherwise, you have to be separated for 2 years if you want to proceed on no-fault grounds. If you allege a fault-based divorce, you have to establish grounds. The statute is below.

You also ask about signing the condo lease. You do not need his signature and can re-sign on your own. However, he has to be willing to move out. Is he going to be willing to do that?

If not, when the lease is up, make plans to move somewhere else and take all of the things that are yours or that you want. Do it when he is not at home if he is abusive. Document whatever you leave behind. You can fight about its value later, but if you leave it, you will have a hard time getting it back.

I suggest that while you make plans, go and see a local family lawyer and pay for 30-60 minutes of the lawyer's time just to be advised of your rights regarding divorce. If money is tight, just move out and wait the 2 years if your husband will not consent to the divorce. There is no sense for you to pursue a fault-based divorce if you can't afford it.

When your two years is up, check with your county bar association or family court to see if they have do-it-yourself-divorce kits or if there are any lawyers in town who will do it for a reduced fee or "pro bono" (for free). There are still filing fees unless you meet the test for indigency and can get the court to waive the fees. Each court has their own guidelines so you will need to ask the court about that.

23 Pa.C.S.A. � 3301

Purdon's Pennsylvania Statutes and Consolidated Statutes Currentness

Title 23 Pa.C.S.A. � 3301. Grounds for divorce

(a) Fault.--The court may grant a divorce to the innocent and injured spouse whenever it is judged that the other spouse has:

(1) Committed willful and malicious desertion, and absence from the habitation of the injured and innocent spouse, without a reasonable cause, for the period of one or more years.

(2) Committed adultery.

(3) By cruel and barbarous treatment, endangered the life or health of the injured and innocent spouse.

(4) Knowingly entered into a bigamous marriage while a former marriage is still subsisting.

(5) Been sentenced to imprisonment for a term of two or more years upon conviction of having committed a crime.

(6) Offered such indignities to the innocent and injured spouse as to render that spouse's condition intolerable and life burdensome.

(b) Institutionalization.--The court may grant a divorce from a spouse upon the ground that insanity or serious mental disorder has resulted in confinement in a mental institution for at least 18 months immediately before the commencement of an action under this part and where there is no reasonable prospect that the spouse will be discharged from inpatient care during the 18 months subsequent to the commencement of the action. A presumption that no prospect of discharge exists shall be established by a certificate of the superintendent of the institution to that effect and which includes a supporting statement of a treating physician.

(c) Mutual consent.--The court may grant a divorce where it is alleged that the marriage is irretrievably broken and 90 days have elapsed from the date of commencement of an action under this part and an affidavit has been filed by each of the parties evidencing that each of the parties consents to the divorce.

(d) Irretrievable breakdown.--

(1) The court may grant a divorce where a complaint has been filed alleging that the marriage is irretrievably broken and an affidavit has been filed alleging that the parties have lived separate and apart for a period of at least two years and that the marriage is irretrievably broken and the defendant either:

(i) Does not deny the allegations set forth in the affidavit.

(ii) Denies one or more of the allegations set forth in the affidavit but, after notice and hearing, the court determines that the parties have lived separate and apart for a period of at least two years and that the marriage is irretrievably broken.

(2) If a hearing has been held pursuant to paragraph (1)(ii) and the court determines that there is a reasonable prospect of reconciliation, then the court shall continue the matter for a period not less than 90 days nor more than 120 days unless the parties agree to a period in excess of 120 days. During this period, the court shall require counseling as provided in section 3302 (relating to counseling). If the parties have not reconciled at the expiration of the time period and one party states under oath that the marriage is irretrievably broken, the court shall determine whether the marriage is irretrievably broken. If the court determines that the marriage is irretrievably broken, the court shall grant the divorce. Otherwise, the court shall deny the divorce.

(e) No hearing required in certain cases.--If grounds for divorce alleged in the complaint or counterclaim are established under subsection (c) or (d), the court shall grant a divorce without requiring a hearing on any other grounds.

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Answered on 8/30/11, 9:23 pm


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