Legal Question in Family Law in South Dakota

Re: Leaving home at 17 years and 10 months old, not 18 yet, can i leave?

I am an attorney in Montana, so I cannot tell you about South Dakota law. But that never

stopped me from giving advice -- just remember as you read that I am not talking about South

Dakota law. You don�t mention physical abuse, so I will assume you�re safe at home.

First: You said, �I have heard . . . .� You can always get into trouble going by what other people

sat. There�s power in the truth. It�s your responsibility to find what the truth is. Go to your

county library and ask the Reference Desk person to point you to the South Dakota code. Look

up Minors and Parent-Child in the index and read about your rights and responsibilities.

Second: Yes, technically, SD law might recognize you as a runaway if you leave home without

permission.

Third: Yes, police officers can always come get you no matter how old you are and no matter

that you might not have done anything wrong. Their job is to investigate report they receive, and

they�ll come get you even if it�s just to investigate a report that you left home without permis

sion. Even if you�re innocent of any wrongdoing, having the police come to your friend�s door to

get you is disturbing and disruptive to your friend�s household and embarrassing for you. You

can avoid that scenario.

Fourth: Even if SD law allows you to leave without permission, even if your parents give you

permission, this is an important crossroads in your relationship with your parents and in your

relationship with the rest of the world. Everybody goes through tough times. Will you face

tough times or run? I have two children who reached 18 living with me (single parent house

hold) and we all survived -- and nobody was bleeding, so I think we did pretty well. Humor

helped, so did understanding that we didn�t like each other right that minute, but we loved each

other before that minute, we loved each other durint that minute, and we trusted that we would

love each afterward.

Here�s what I suggest: Say �Look, we�re having a really hard time right now. Can we please sit

down tonight and talk about it?� It doesn�t have to be �tonight� but give everybody time to think

about what they want to say. Many schools and communities have �peer mediators� who help

families talk through a tough situation where emotions might run high. Perhaps a mediator can

help you all see each other�s points of view.