Legal Question in Family Law in Utah
Alamony payments
My x-husband signed an agreement at our divorce in Utah which says he'll take care of me for the rest of my life. We were married for 26 years and had 7 children together. He found a younger woman and married her a week and a half after the divorce. He was not faithful during the marriage. He keeps telling our children that I am a moocher and I shouldn't take advantage of him. I should release him of his obligations and fend for myself. Most children were older at the time of the divorce so I moved back to Canada...and brought our 3 youngest with me. They are now grown. One of them was diagnosed with a life-threatening disease after the divorce and still goes to the hospital on a regular basis with no remission in sight. It's been 10 years. I have taken care of her without him. I have gone back to school and work when I can. Do I have to feel guilty for his ''generous offerings''? He has never missed a payment for which I am very grateful but do I have to feel like a burden to him? I was with him through the lean years and supported him while he went back to school to become a doctor. He earns an amount yearly in the 6 figures. I don't feel like he is being taken advantage of. Please give me some information on this matter.
2 Answers from Attorneys
Re: Alamony payments
Look up narcissism. Your ex is a narcissist, to whom his money and selfish image means more than anything else. I doubt that any of your children believe you are a "mooch." I'll bet he was not at home much to help raise the children. Ignore his infantile whining and keep cashing the checks. You earned, and keep earning your money. BTW, it is not his money, it is yours.
Re: Alamony payments
You say that you moved back to "Canada", but do not say to which Province. The law varies Province by Province as it is largely not Federal,so the answer to your question depends to some extent on which Province you are in and on the agreement itself, which would have to be reviewed by a lawyer to giveyou a definitive answer. We urge you to do so; you can obtain a very low cost initial consultation in British Columbia by calling the lawyer referral service of the Canadian Bar Association who will refer you to a lawyer for an initial appointment at $25.00; many lawyers charge othing for an initial consultation and you can just call some from the phone book and ask.
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