Legal Question in Family Law in Utah

Re: I want sole custody of my kids - how difficult is it to change this?

I don�t practice in your state, so my state law might be different from yours.

An interesting �coincidence� I�ve noticed is that one parent (often fathers) �goes for custody�

when s/he remarries. Does girlfriend have children?

I�ll start with your third question first --

how can you prepare for a long and expensive fight. A child-related legal issue is not one to take on unassisted. Get an attorney. Get a Guardian ad Litem to advocate for the children�s best interests. Be aware that the litigation itself will be a stressor for the children, and is not something you should take on without a great deal of thought and evaluation -- an

attorney can help you evaluate your case. My acid test is this: Since the other parent isn�t willing to mediate a parenting plan, this will require attorneys, Guardians ad Litem, nivestigation, litigation. Are you prepared to get a bank loan, borrow from ggrandparents, sell the boat? Are you prepared to lose sleep, be worried about your kids, be worried about the outcome, etc.? Are you prepared to cope with added strain between you and your partner, maybe go to the extra expense of seeing a therapist?

Your chances of success depend on what your state law requires for modifying a parenting plan. My state no longer uses the term "custody," and sole custody was always a high hurdle to jump. Also, courts don�t let parents play ping pong with their kids, so as you read down the statutory factors, make sure you can meet the requirement. When you and your attorney get

to the point that you believe you have enough evidence, by virtue of the number of factors you

can satisfy or the seriousness of the problem, you are at the point where you consider filing a

motion to amend. If the kids expressed concerns about dad or girlfriend, maybe let them talk to a

therapist. Be prepared to move the court for Guardian ad Litem for the children. GALs in my

jurisdiction can order a chemical/alcohol eval and subsequent counseling, and can recommend

tailoring the parenting plan until that parent complies.

You said, �I have documented proof of extreme mental abuse regarding this issue.� Good. Too

many custody disputes are based on �he said, she said� with no evidence. Save the answering

machine tapes and email. If you have a legitimate concern for your safety, get an order of protection.