Legal Question in Family Law in Virginia

Alienation of affection

I have recently found out that my husband has been having a love affair with a co-worker that has lasted about one year. I was suspicious in January and convinced that it was only a friendship. Now I have proof and a confession from my spouse. We have been married 16 1/2 years, have two beautiful boys and am uncertain as to what I am going to do. I feel the need to talk to the other woman and her husband, I think he should know all that I know. I attempted to talk to her and she agreed to come to our home, she didn't. I left her a note on her door to contact me as she had promised. She told my husband that she had told her husband everything, he says he needs to hear nothing from us, and if I continued to contact her he would consider this harassment. I believe this is her way of making me not contact him. She has lied about the affair, as well as my husband, and I don't believe she told him the truth. I feel like if she had, he would have contacted my husband to protect his interest. I want the truth known to him and wonder how this can be done, where does alienation of affection come in to play, or am I totally offbase? I don't know many men who would accept their wife having a sexual affair with another man and do nothing.


Asked on 8/11/04, 8:19 am

2 Answers from Attorneys

Shane Jimison Jimison/Homiller, PLC

Re: Alienation of affection

There are a lot of elements in your posting, most of them being emotional. Which, is totally understandable. Since you tried to contact a lawyer through this, let me tell you the legal ramifications of what you have told me, as you have told me. Please note, that this cannot constitute legal advice, because I simply don't know enough information, and its my policy not to give free advice for liability concerns. That being said, adultery is a ground for divorce in Virginia. The defense for adultery (among other things) is condonation. If H tells W that he had an affair, and W forgives him and they reconcile, H's adultery is no longer a ground for divorce (very generally speaking here, your case may be different).

Alienation of affection is not a grounds for divorce in Virginia, we do have cruelty and desertion grounds, but the parties must still be separated for 1 year before they may obtain a divorce based on those grounds. There is no waiting period for adultery. Feel free to check out my website www.jimisonlaw.com for more general divorce information. Let me know if I can help in any way.

Read more
Answered on 8/11/04, 8:47 am
Michael Hendrickson Law Office Michael E. Hendrickson

Re: Alienation of affection

You're headed down the wrong path in this matter.

If your husband's identified paramour doesn't want your contact or further involvement in her family matters, her wishes should be respected.

Your failure to abide by her apparent position

on this matter will only lead to further trouble and difficulty for all involved.

Read more
Answered on 8/11/04, 10:46 am


Related Questions & Answers

More Family Law, Divorce, Child Custody and Adoption questions and answers in Virginia