Legal Question in Family Law in Virginia

Child support & visitation

2 children (12 and 14), I am the custodial parent, X has the standard visitation (every other w/end, Wed. adn 1/2 summer). Both children participate in sports and practices and games, camps, etc.. Invariably 'stuff' falls on 'his time' and he makes life miserable for all because I am 'dictating' his time with the kids. The kids are fed up with being made to feel guilty and miss things they want to do. How difficult is it to amend the visitation schedule? Can it be worded so that they will visit only when it is mutually agreeable? Is that simply revoking his visitation altgether? I have asked him to be flexible..but he won't.

Are visitation rights contingent at all on support payments? If I try to do this - I know he will want to stop support payments. Thanks -


Asked on 5/12/04, 10:54 am

2 Answers from Attorneys
Michael Hendrickson Law Office Michael E. Hendrickson

Re: Child support & visitation

Visitation rights are in no way contingent upon nor linked in any way to the issue of child support.

The changes to the visitation schedule which you're proposing should be discussed with an attorney knowledgeable in Virginia family law issues and who is also familar with the local court(s) which have jurisdiction over these matters.

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Answered on 5/12/04, 11:10 am
Paul B. Ward Law Offices of Paul B. Ward

Re: Child support & visitation

The court will not allow him to stop support payments because of disagreements over visitation. He could stop, but a court would pull him up short for having done so.

On the issue of the kids' extracurricular activities interfering with his visitation, that's going to happen, and it can be worked out. One way is to ask a court to work it out; another and better way is to discuss it openly between the parents, perhaps with input from the kids; if you and he can't deal with it alone, it's generally a good idea to seek the assistance of a court approved mediator, who will help facilitate the discussions but will not make the decisions for you. A mutually agreed upon mediator will save both of you money and is less likely to polarize the parents.

I am not blowing my own horn; I'm not a court approved mediator. I'm just a lawyer who shared custody of a child with his mother some years ago.

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Answered on 5/12/04, 11:42 am


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