Legal Question in Family Law in Virginia

Emotional Infidelity

I have been married for 131/2 years and my wife has started a relationship with a neighbor. She spends 90% of her time over there and is never around to help in the house or anything. To the point of she sleeps over there 80% of the time. She is adament about not sleeping with him and I don't beleave she is, It is an emotional affair. She admits to sleeping in the same bed twice and holding hands hugging and some kissing and having strong feelings for him and thinks they may have a future together and says he has even talked of marriage with her. She says that she wants a divorce and he is not the cause they are just ''friends''. Is there any grounds for divorce for me and any path I can do to protect myself as the victim. This has been going on for about a month now and I don't see her stopping it. Is there a legal ground for emotional abandenment or emotional infedelity? She says she knows it is wrong but she is not sleeping with him and we are getting a divorce, I want to say she thinks since no sex is involved it is okay. Is it?

Thank you.


Asked on 10/16/02, 2:50 pm

1 Answer from Attorneys
Elizabeth Jones Elizabeth Ann Jones, P.C.

Re: Emotional Infidelity

In Virginia, there are several fault grounds for divorce. These include cruelty (usually physical, not emotional only), adultery (that means sexual intercourse with someone other than one's spouse) and desertion (leaving the marriage without the other party's consent). All of these grounds must be proven to the court's satisfaction. Based on what you have told me in your statement, you appear to have desertion as a fault ground. There is a no fault ground for divorce. If you have minor children, you must be separated for one year and one of the parties must have the intention to remain permanently separated. At the end of the one year separation, either of you may file for divorce without proving any fault on either party's part. If you do not have minor children AND you have a written agreement between the two of you as to support and division of assets and debt that you have both signed, either of you may file for divorce at the end of a six month separation. As long as she has not had sexual intercourse with the man in question, she has not, in legal terms, committed adultery.

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Answered on 10/16/02, 4:09 pm


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