Legal Question in Family Law in Washington
divorce and custody
I have a strange situation. My husband and I have been living with each other off and on for several years. He has a history of sexual adiction and I have a history of mental disability. We have 4 kids ages 5-11. Right now I am stable on medications and I take care of my children full time and most of what needs to be done with housework, laundry etc. I know for a fact that my husband uses me as a live-in nanny. He has a girlfriend who was one of the reasons we broke up the last time...she has treated my children poorly and has not been allowed to have a relationship with them since I moved back in (from my parents...I could not have my kids with me there or I would have) with my husband over a year ago(I moved in to be with my kids and for no other reason). Right now I feel I have the means to take care of my children away from my husband until a divorce is final and I receive child support. I know my husband will do what he can to prevent me from doing this. When I talk to my husband about one of us moving out (and me keeping the kids) he tells me to move back to my parents. He tells me he will not allow me to keep the kids even though I am the one who care for them 95% of the time. My husband is a sexual swinger and I want out.
1 Answer from Attorneys
Re: divorce and custody
Your situation is not unheard of. You should not fear losing custody based on his assertions. This falls under my rubric of "don't take legal advice from potentially adverse parties".
There are very good DV resources available locally. You can find them on line, or by going to the courthouse Family law resource center.
Sounds to me as if what you are describing is a situation where he's domineering you by making you believe that if you object you will lose everything. This is domestic violence even if it does not involve physical violence.
I don't know enough about your situation to advise you, but based on what you are saying I would strongly recommend that you go speak with an advocate at the courthouse, and ask for a referral to a local attorney who is seasoned at family law and custody issues. You should not lose custody when you have been the children's primary caretaker just because he doesn't want to "allow" it.
Best of luck with this - Elizabeth Powell
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