Legal Question in Family Law in Minnesota

Re: Settle out of court

Thank you for your question about how to expedite your divorce settlement.

Your question is an important one. A divorce can be expensive and acrimonious, and in many cases the parties may wonder whether the entire process is worth the time, money and effort.

The first thing to remember is that you and your spouse are ultimately in control of your case, and if you agree upon the terms of a settlement, you are free (with some restrictions) to do what you please. Here is a range of possible options:

1. Fire your attorneys, sit down and prepare a stipulation and proposed order using forms from a "web laywer" or book, and submit the papers to the court for approval. The "pro's" of this approach is that it is cheap. If you and your spouse have few assets, no problems with custody, support or maintenance, and trust each other, it could work. The "con's" are that you may not know what opportunities you are missing and may not recognize some fairly routine (to a lawyer) problems, or may inadvertently create problems that will only later become apparent. The most common problems with do-it-yourself divorces usually revolve around awkward parenting time schedules, botched pension valuation or division, or omitted assets. Also, you need to be aware that your capacity to negotiate child support (if that's an issue) is somewhat limited, since the right to child support does not belong to the custodial parent, and must be approved by the court.

2. Hire a skilled mediator, or work with one of your lawyers. Pros -- cheaper, profesional supervision and legal guidance, less likelihood of common procedural and legal problems (pensions, real estate, parenting time goof ups). Cons -- a single lawyer or mediator cannot really give each of you individual advice, no matter how "neutral" he or she may purport to be.

3. In a variation of number 2, sit down with your spouse and prepare a draft settlement agreement, then submit it to each of your lawyers, or to one of them, with instructions to draft a stipulation and decree.

I recognize that, in some cases, the lawyers can get more wound up in the case than the parties. This is more often true of "green" lawyers, but it is also something of a professional hazard in this area of the law. Despite this, if you have at least one seasoned lawyer in your case, his or her advice could be worth the cost, and if neither of your lawyers meet your expectations of professionalism, perhaps you can find another lawyer and explain your circumstances. In any case, if you and your spouse really can work together, openly and honestly, the chances are you will be more likely to come through the process in one piece.

If you have further questions or concerns, my contact information is below. Good luck.