Legal Question in Family Law in Washington

Re: Custody of 13 year old son

The reason a judge will not entertain a written statement from your son or hear from him in person is because the Courts and legislature and child mental health professionals all agree that the only thing worse than putting kids through a divorce is making them choose which parent to live with.

Kids naturally do not want to disappoint either parent and are particularly stressed out during dissolutions and the post dissolution custody fights that occur. What you ought to do if you want your son's views presented is to ask the Court to appoint a Guardian Ad Litem ("GAL") who will speak on your son's behalf. This person will interview him outside you or his mother's presence and hear him out and that take into account. The GAL then determines what is in his best interest and make a recommendation to the court on how to proceed.

The GAL may also interview you and your ex to help in assessing what is in your son's best interest in considering how to make a recommendation.

As for your chances of becoming the primary residential parent, I have no idea with the information at hand. To provide this type of assessment, you need to hire an attorney to review all the documents filed in the case to date to provide you with the assessment you desire. Sorry, this site is too limited in the ability to answer that type of detailed question.

Re: Custody of 13 year old son

The mechanism that the court utilizes to take into consideration the wishes of a child is a Guardian Ad Litem (GAL) or a Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) or a parenting evaluation through the Family Court Services (FCS). GALs are generally paid, CASAs and FCS are "free" services. You should in a motion for temporary orders, ask for one of them to be appointed. You will need to determine what is available under your local court services. The law is structured to not allow a child's direct statement on parenting, because it is stressful for the child to be put in a position of making a statement on parenting and the court does not want these types of statements because parents have often attempted to manipulate children to their own purposes. Imagine what it is like for the child to have both parents trying to get a child make a statement on who they want to live with, and you can understand why the legislature passed a law that effectively prohibits use of such statements.