Legal Question in Family Law in Michigan

The child would likely go to her parents. Certainly not to you.

Reporting this would be a terrible choice, in my opinion.

I think it is better to deal with the new grandchild that is coming than to ruin your son's life. And you would surely do that to your son if you forced him to testify.

Are you serious? They're irresponsible. You're angry. I get it. My advice to you is to get a grip on yourself. Kids have sex. And they're stupid. And they ignore their parents. And sometimes they get pregnant before they're ready to be parents. Before I answer your question let me first inform you of the legal consequences of what you're talking about? This girl, who is soon to be THE MOTHER OF YOUR GRANDCHILD, can spend up to 15 years in prison and have to register as a sex offender for up to 25 years. Why? Because she's a 17-year-old girl who had consensual sex with a 15-year-old.

Let's think about the legal ramifications from your not-yet-born grandchild's point of view. Let's assume it's a she. She will be born into this world as the child of a convicted felon and registered sex offender. That's a nice label to slap on a child before it's even born. Or from another perspective, her mother will be a convicted sex offender. I bet she'll be the only kid in class with that distinction. Also, she will be born in prison. That will be a nice memory for the child to share with her own grandchildren. She can even keep a picture of herself being held by her mother wearing her prison jumpsuit for the scrapbook. While she's in prison the child can be placed elsewhere and won't have the love and nurturing of its own mother in its infancy. And why? Because the mother is a 17-year-old girl who had consensual sex with a 15-year-old.

When your grandchild is in school her mother won't be able to participate in school activities with her because while she is on the sex offender registry the mother will be restricted from coming within 1,000 feet of a school zone. That means no mom to watch the school play. No mom to drive her to, or pick her up from school. No mom to chaperon dances or field trips. No mom to attend concerts or graduation. Sure, all the other kids will have their moms there beaming with pride and taking pictures, but not your grandchild. Her mother is a registered sex offender. And why? For offending your sense of propriety? For disobeying you?

Of course we shouldn't overlook the studies indicating that children raised in single-parent households have higher rates of depression and lower academic performance. Imagine living with the stigma of knowing that your mother is a convicted sex offender and that you're the product of a sex crime.

Now let's consider the ramifications on your son. Let's suppose that he and this girl decide that, when she gets released from prison, they are going to marry and raise their child together. Where do you suppose your son and his sex-offender wife will be able to live? Do you think anyone is going to willingly rent to a sex offender? How do you think the neighbors will take to having a sex offender in the neighborhood? Oh, they'll know she's a sex offender. The registry is open to the public with an accompanying picture of the offender. Do you think your son will ever get tired of having to explain their situation to the neighbors? Friends? Co-workers? Do you think she'll be able to contribute financially if she has to admit to being a registered sex offender on every application she fills out? Many employers do online criminal background checks now. You can bet that will show up.

Maybe they won't decide to live the happily-ever-after, fairy tale life. But if you prosecute you take away that option.

Oh, and let's not forget this girl's parents. Like it or not, you are inextricably connected to them for the rest of your life. If you choose to prosecute, are you ever going to be able to be in the same room with these people? When she's giving birth? On your grandchild's first birthday? At his/her graduation? Do you think these people are just going to go away? Are you willing to make your grandchild deal with that kind of animosity between her grandparents so that the family can't be together on special occasions? And by the way, they are part of the family now, like it or not. They are effectively your in-laws.

Considering all that, let me remind you of something - SHE'S 17 YEARS OLD! Maybe she's a miserable, rotten, hateful, shrew of a 17-year-old. She's still ONLY 17 YEARS OLD! Maybe she and your son hate each other and have no interest in getting married. She's still ONLY 17 YEARS OLD! People do terrible things in anger. Think about the consequences of your actions and don't make decisions in haste.

Here's a thought - what if the girlfriend's parents are as angry about this as you are and they pressure their daughter to claim she was forcibly raped. What if they demand HE be prosecuted?

Now, to answer your question: 3rd degree criminal sexual conduct. The statute of limitations is 10 years from the date of the act for each act. When the child is born your son can establish paternity and seek custody. Or you can seek custody. Of HER parents can seek custody. Or maybe you can all spend thousands of dollars fighting for custody. Or the child can become a ward of the state.

Pay attention: THIS IS THE MOTHER OF YOUR GRANDCHILD AND WILL BE FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. Get used to it. This isn't about you. It's about your child, your grandchild, and your grandchild's mother. This girl and your son have done enough damage and their child will probably have a hard enough time being raised by such young, irresponsible parents. Think long and hard before you decide to ruin other people and compound the damage to your grandchild in the process.

You have two choices. One is to prosecute. It will cause heartbreak and ruin, and make the life of your son, his girlfriend, and your grandchild more difficult. The other choice is to help these two irresponsible kids be good parents, provide for their child, and make your grandchild's future as easy and hopeful as possible.

So scream at the top of your lungs. Throw a chair across the room. Pound on the floor and cry for half an hour. Then talk to your son about what he wants and make the best decision for your child and grandchild.